Courtesy of Rob Park and Strings Squash Club
The Screamin' Ab Dabs 'A' - The full monty!!!
The Screamin' Ab Dabs was formed purely for the fun of playing squash, some
people however, take their squash far to seriously! The 'A' team is listed below with some
useful comments on their nature. All in good fun so enjoy!
Number 1.
Eric Burdett, known as the silver fox. Mooches around the
squash court and looks nothing like a squash player should. On a good day looks really
ill, but on a bad day looks like death! Has actually been quizzed on the state of his
health during a team game!
Number 2.
Mike Lawrence, known as the bandit. Plays squash to the
limit, nobody can stay with him let alone beat him. Unfortunately it's all in his mind!
Confuses all his opponents by playing left handed when really he's right handed. Problem
is his right hand is false so he has to play left handed!
Number 3.
Andy Howells, known as baby face. Always got a sheepish
grin when he askes for a 'let/stroke'. Has to smile because he doesn't actually know the
difference so his grin turns to a beaming smile if he gets awarded a stroke! Member of the
Squash for Beer club, only plays squash to drink more beer!
Number 4.
Bob Sheffield, known as 'How Much?' If it's not free
doesn't want it. Plays all his shots with a straight arm - really annoying! Getting well
past his play by date but refuses to admit it.
Number 5.
Lawrence Jones, known as the drop. Only knows how to play
squash with a drop shot. The most boring person in the world to ever play squash, warming
the ball up is a total waste of time. During the winter months you could fire the ball out
of a cannon and it still wouldn't get past the 'T'! Always looking for a game but has a
problem finding people willing to play!
Number 6.
Paul Wright, known as big Paul. 16st of karate brawn who
thinks squash is for 'pussies'. Bullies himself around the court, argues continually with
the referee because he's always right. After a hard game will drink 10 pints of Special
Vat so that he doesn't 'dehydrate'! Actually one of the better players but fails to make
the team regular due to lack of commitment. Not just a member of the Squash for beer club
but a major contributor to keeping Strings open!
